Happy Halloween!

Super Girl and Princess Leia (I had no hand in the costume choices, but praise Jesus there are NO fairy princesses this year. Go girl power!)


No clue what brought on this posture (nor why Leia is wearing cowgirl boots) (nor why Leia refused at the last minute to wear her wig, but praise Jesus again that Mom is handy with a hairbrush)



Please note the boots. It will be important later.




Awesome! CANDY!!!!!! Her next words: "We have to get maximum candy!"



Notice the footwear? Yeah, you can take the girl outta the princess... or something. She ditched the boots, is what I'm sayin'. But you can still run in sandals, and run you must, when in pursuit of maximum candy.



Oh, the running.



The motley mom crew with whom we trick or treated.



This was our littlest crew member, and she had a wee bit of trouble keeping up. The following photo sums up her view for pretty much the entire evening:





And now for the best pirate dad and husband of the year:

Car Keys and Pumpkin Interpretation

So The Man commented today that it was ironic that I linked to a memorial post to Common Sense on the same day that I discovered, 4 hours before I was to leave Los Angeles, that I had left my car keys 3 hours away at my mom's house.

Um... huh. Quite the dilemma. Wouldn't be a problem if I hadn't driven my car to the airport in Texas and left it in long term parking. Still wouldn't be much of a problem if we didn't live and work 45 minutes away from the airport. STILL wouldn't be a problem if I didn't have to ask The Man, already having missed a day of work to stay home with Loodle on Monday to deal with an ear infection, to come to the airport and bring me his set of keys. In the middle of his work day.

Yeah, I was in the dog house a little yesterday. However, after getting off the plane, coming down the escalators and, upon seeing him, bursting into tears, he let me off the hook a little. And then he proceeded to hug me to death, listen to my tearful reasons for crying (I missed you so much and today's the day my dad died and I'm watching all these people meet and hug in the airport and the lady at American Airlines let the guy in his military uniform upgrade to first class for freeeeee, WAAAAAHHHHH) and take me out to lunch, no recriminations or grumpiness ensuing. Gotta love that guy.

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We carved pumpkins tonight, and there's really no funny anecdote involved. Just tradition being passed forward one more time. I think after the kids are gone to college, I'll still be carving pumpkins and coloring Easter eggs.

I got no pictures during the actual carving, because hello? Expensive camera + pumpkin goop + control freak + sharp knives = no cameras allowed. Here are the finished products:

The Man's and Boodle's


Mine and Loodle's

Here's where I need your interpretive skills:

The Man's pumpkin is the top pumpkin in the first picture. The girls thought it was an awesome vampire pumpkin, and that was his intention. BUT, the longer I stare at it, this pumpkin appears to have a goofy, wide open mouth sporting one giant tooth.

Your thoughts?

Wordless Wednesday

I thank my God upon every remembrance of you.

- Philippians 1:3

R.I.P. Common Sense

I had to link to this post from The Farmer's Wife over at Don't Pee On My Floor!.

This perfectly encapsulates my feelings on the loss of reason in our society.

Please go check it out.

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Musings From the Road

I'm off on a trip to California, ALONE, to visit family and friends. After being in California for 5 weeks this summer, then suffering a debilitating migraine THE DAY I was supposed to leave on a girls weekend away, and watching The Man leave 5 days later on a 5 day gaming vacation, I decided I needed a cocktail vacation of my own.

It's not the first time I've taken off on my own. Some of my friends think I'm a little nutty to go by myself, but I'm the type to need some time where I'm accountable to no one but myself. I've gone to the spa, movies, dinner, the beach, pretty much anywhere by myself, and loved every minute of it. I come back energized and ready to take on the world.

I left last night from Texas, and at the airport I noted two events:

a. A poor woman wearing high-heeled boots tripped on the edge of the carpet near our gate and fell face forward onto the ground. One should never, ever show even a scintilla of amusement at someone else's misfortune in this circumstance, but here's the thing. She was large of chest, and carrying a large plastic bag filled with merchandise, and when she fell, her chest closed off the top of the bag (trapping any air that was in there) and the rest of her body popped it. I know. How do you not laugh at that? I didn't by the way, but only by the grace of God. She was fine, so don't get all judgy with me. Admit it, it's funny as all get out. And imagine that right after that giant popping sound there immediately followed a complete hush throughout the airport. I was in line to get dinner, and I wanted to do SOMETHING to make up for her humiliation, but I didn't think a chili dog would be taken in the manner it was intended.

b. As I waited for said chili dog at the sports bar, a flight attendant walked up to ask if they sold wine there, and when told yes, she waited for a minute next to me, and then walked off. As she passed by, I detected that she'd already had some wine, and wondered if there was some rule about stewardesses being sober before flying. Thoughts?

Today was filled with shopping with my mom and dishing over beer battered onion rings (SHUT UP I'M ON VACATION). Heaven on earth. Hope to be back online sometime before I get back, but if not, have a great weekend. And seriously, be careful in heels.

Wordless Wednesday: Escape Artist

Fashion Tuesday

Wow. This is something. Just to clarify: yes, I do let her go to school like this. I've long since given up the fight on trying to get things to match. It's not worth it, and frankly, who am I to say what looks good? She's strong willed, and my concern for her getting teased by classmates is dampened by that knowledge. She'll kick their bootays if they hassle her.

Further clarification: those socks are SUPPOSED to be mis-matched. They actually came as a set of three different colored socks, and whichever one is not being used inevitably gets thrown into the unmatched socks bucket, because I'm a moron.

Further further clarification: her shoe broke at school during the day. I'm not THAT permissive as to send her to school with broken shoes.

Bugs and Hamsters

Bugs and computers do not mix.

My laptop is full of bugs. Literally. Bugs. I opened it first thing this morning and noticed a teeny bug crawling on the screen. Didn't think much of it until I saw another on the keyboard, and then three more crawled out from under the keys. I dropped the girls off at school, came back, and there were more.

The hell? How does a LAPTOP get infested with bugs? It's not like it sits gathering cobwebs. I'm on it a LOT. I checked the table next to my beloved green chair and it too had teeny tiny bugs scurrying about. Gross. This says so much about my domestic skills.

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I briefly mentioned previously that we got the girls hamsters. Boodle named hers Hamilton, after the hamster The Man had as a kid. Loodle named her Max, after the hamster from Boodle's third grade classroom (the beast that started all this).

Hamilton started out as the social butterfly. Loved coming out and seeing people, crawling around the living room and cavorting with the family. However, after spending two weeks with an 8-year-old with self-control issues, he's starting to get a little hinky. I'm working with Boodle on the calm factor, which is sorely lacking in her little body.

Max started out as a biting menace. I was SURE he would be returned to PetSmart inside of a week, but The Man helped Max figure out that people are indeed not food, and he now only takes the occasional curious nibble.

However, Max has turned his curiosity in a different direction, and is now an intrepid explorer. He loves to crawl all around the living room, foraging for crumbs in the couch cushions and repeatedly tasting the potpourri on the buffet behind the couch. Last night, we discovered the level to which his explorations have risen. Loodle came into our bedroom around 4am, sniveling, complaining that there was a hamster in her bed.

IN HER BED. The Man got up to investigate. Sure enough, the wily critter escaped from his cage, dropped down from the top of the dresser, and somehow got up into her bed. See, there are round openings at the top of the cage into which you can insert tubes and create wild trails, and one of them was left open this weekend after Max's cage got cleaned. Just last evening I told The Man we should take bets on which hamster figured out how to get out first.

Should have known. Max is now firmly ensconced in his cage, the hole covered with a book topped with The Man's old baseball trophy. Poor Max. Hamster trailer trash at such a young age.

Wouldn't It Be Loverly?

Saw this quiz over at Chicky Chicky Baby, and had to try it. It is surprisingly spot on for me. Not the picture. I wish. But my middle name IS Audrey, so this must be significant.

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Your result for Are You a Jackie or a Marilyn? Or Someone Else? Mad Men-era Female Icon Quiz...

You Are an Audrey!

You are an Audrey -- "I am at peace"

Audreys are receptive, good-natured, and supportive. They seek union with others and the world around them.

How to Get Along with Me

• * If you want me to do something, how you ask is important. I especially don't like expectations or pressure


• * I like to listen and to be of service, but don't take advantage of this


• * Listen until I finish speaking, even though I meander a bit


• * Give me time to finish things and make decisions. It's OK to nudge me gently and nonjudgmentally


• * Ask me questions to help me get clear


• * Tell me when you like how I look. I'm not averse to flattery


• * Hug me, show physical affection. It opens me up to my feelings


• * I like a good discussion but not a confrontation


• * Let me know you like what I've done or said


• * Laugh with me and share in my enjoyment of life

What I Like About Being an Audrey

• * being nonjudgmental and accepting


• * caring for and being concerned about others


• * being able to relax and have a good time


• * knowing that most people enjoy my company; I'm easy to be around


• * my ability to see many different sides of an issue and to be a good mediator and facilitator


• * my heightened awareness of sensations, aesthetics, and the here and now


• * being able to go with the flow and feel one with the universe

What's Hard About Being an Audrey

• * being judged and misunderstood for being placid and/or indecisive


• * being critical of myself for lacking initiative and discipline


• * being too sensitive to criticism; taking every raised eyebrow and twitch of the mouth personally


• * being confused about what I really want


• * caring too much about what others will think of me


• * not being listened to or taken seriously

Audreys as Children Often

• * feel ignored and that their wants, opinions, and feelings are unimportant


• * tune out a lot, especially when others argue


• * are "good" children: deny anger or keep it to themselves

Audreys as Parents

• * are supportive, kind, and warm


• * are sometimes overly permissive or nondirective

Take Are You a Jackie or a Marilyn? Or Someone Else? Mad Men-era Female Icon Quiz at HelloQuizzy

Wordless Wednesday: We Love This Lady!

I'm Off For a While

My sister-in-law is visiting us this week (happy birthday Tiffer Time!), and unless we do something wild and crazy that I just HAVE to share with you, I probably won't be posting much.

Here's a placeholder photo that I'm reposting. I can't get enough of this.



Yes, that's a night light from IKEA in her pull-up. What of it?

Have a great week!!

Shhh,.. Don't Tell My Husband

I have a new boyfriend. I know I said yesterday that I loved my husband and all, but dude. My new guy? He's the bomb.

I met him today, and you might think I'm rushing things, but I have to disagree. When it's right, you just know.

His name? Not important. Where did our destiny begin? At checkout stand 3 in HEB, our local grocery store. Romantic setting indeed.

Why do I love him? Well, because he's the cutest, awesomest little old man who bags groceries that you could ever lay eyes on. Oh, didn't I mention he's on the wrinkly side of 70? Don't let our age difference bother you. The heart wants what it wants.

I fell in love with my new dude after he uttered these remarkable words to me, upon hearing me ask how he was doing today:

"Well, I'm fat and sassy. Which I guess beats skinny and dead. I like to tell that to the ladies."

Could I resist that smooth, semi-bald lothario? I submit that I could NOT.

If you're looking for me tonight, you'll find me at Luby's having dinner at 4pm. We're a match made in heaven.

Reasons I Love My Husband

4. He gets up with the girls three days a week and gets them ready for school, allowing me to sleep in like the lazy bum I am.

3. He bought the girls hamsters this weekend, and is solely responsible for helping them to acclimate, leaving me to make "Ohhe'ssocuteIwanttosquishhislittleface" noises and live in ignorant bliss.

2. He doesn't hassle me when I'm too lazy to cook dinner. Which is often.

and the best reason there is:

1. When there's a thunderstorm raging in the middle of the night, he gives up his own sleep to comfort not his children, but his weirdo wife who is still afraid of noise, apparently.

For a Good Time, Read...

If you are in need of a good laugh today, well, don't read my blog. I'm just not that funny.

Instead, please go read this post over at Muffin Top's blog. It's quite possibly the funniest, most unfortunate thing I've read in a long time.

Happy Friday!

This Bailout Package

I do not tend to get political, because I'm not one who delves deeply into the issues and researches and formulates heartfelt opinions and prepares to go toe to toe with all comers to defend said opinions to the death. I don't have that kind of time. I tend to find sources which I find reliable and put my trust and faith in them. I'm sure that folks like me infuriate some who believe our future rests squarely in my hands, but frankly, I'm just not that influential.

However. Last night The Man read something from the World Wide Web about the bailout package that the Senate passed. Something about tax exemptions for those who manufacture wooden arrows. I was incredulous, but chalked it up to our wacky government, they do stuff like this all the time, what ELSE is new. Then this morning as I'm surfing my usual news sites, I started thinking about this current "crisis" and the government's response, and those sweeteners really started to cheese me off. From this site's report:



Other Provisions

-The provision of $3.3 billion in funding for rural schools between 2009 and 2012.

-The requirement that private insurance plans that offer mental health benefits fund those benefits to the same extent that they fund other medical services.

-Tax benefits for commercial fishermen and others who received court settlements related to the 1989 Exxon Valdez oil spill.

-An excise tax exemption for producers and importers of certain types of wooden arrows used by children.

-The extension of a tax break for makers of rum in Puerto Rico and the Virgin Islands. The tax measure initially expired in December 2007.


All worthy causes, to be sure. I saw how those kids struggled in school on Little House on the Prairie. And yeah, those fishermen were seriously hosed by the Valdez spill. And crazy people? PLEASE help them. And who doesn't want more rum, and wooden arrows for small children?

But what in the name of all that is sane and of sound reason are these things doing attached to a bill meant to bail out the financial/credit markets? WOODEN ARROWS, for crying. out. loud.

This is precisely why The People are so fed up with our government. They cannot make any kind of decision about the overall welfare of our country without first finding what's in it for them. If this bill were truly what was best for our country, then the addition of sweeteners would not be necessary. What does it say about our Senators that wooden arrow makers have garnered that much sway with someone that a tax exemption was added to this thing before they would consider voting for it?

To borrow from John Boehner, this whole mess is a crap sandwich. Side note: if that man were in my district, I would vote for him on that comment ALONE.

As I said before, I KNOW this stuff has been going on since the beginning of time, and we could write volumes about the waste and ridiculousness. However, the level of panic and haste and frantic declarations of WE MUST ACT NOW led me to believe that first and foremost on their agenda was saving our economy. I fail to see how those additional provisions are crucial to the stability of our country. And I shudder to think of what has further been added to this package.

Okay, now I'm done. I'll be going back to my Entertainment Weekly and Project Runway now.

Wordless Wednesday: A Day At The Park With Turtles and Tiny Fish